What’s the Irish for busybody?

GRANNY knows best as the old saying goes and so RTÉ has ventured into the world of straight talking like only a granny can get away with, or so they would claim.

Mamó, with the first of four episodes airing last Monday night, sees Máire Andrews or Mamó land on the doorsteps of some poor unfortunates to show them how to make the best of what they have, find the joy in the simple things and just generally fill them with some good vibrations.
It’s when I see programmes like this that a gnawing pain begins around my right temple, quickly makes a beeline for the left one and leaves me questioning if I should in fact be paying a TV licence at all and would I be better off dealing only with DVD box sets where I know I’ll get through it without threatening the screen with my teacup.
In the first episode, Mamó visited the Ó Cionnaith family in Cavan town, who consist of Mayo-born Colm, his Bulgarian wife, Danni, and their three children. The couple are looking to keep the family on the straight and narrow while incorporating three languages into their daily lives, which isn’t easy when your children attend a Gaelscoil, mum doesn’t have much Irish and, likewise, dad has pigeon Bulgarian. The fact that they are Moonies would have been a far more interesting line to explore but it never comes up again after the first mention, so no joy there.
Instead Mamó began her mission to fix the so-called problems the family appeared to have, monumental events like Danni being afraid to drive. I would had said, however, deeper help is needed here. Most of their problems, as far as I could tell, stemmed from the fact that Danni couldn’t speak Irish. Maybe I’m being obvious but surely speaking English would have made ‘the problems’ a little less troublesome, or better yet, don’t have an Irish speaking busybody in your kitchen offering ‘advice’. It’s unclear as to how the producers of this fare arrived at the conclusion that Mamó was indeed the best they could come up with on the island. What’s more worrying, however, is whoever pitched this idea for a series was actually listened to and worse, given the green light to make it happen. Five minutes in I could only wonder who the devil was this woman and why was she speaking Irish to Moonies in Cavan. (I should point out in case it wasn’t clear from the Irish title that the series is indeed, in Irish).
Instantly going on an internet search to quell my curiosity, RTÉ informs us that Andrews is from Belfast and only speaks Irish. Which was more interesting when I learned she married a Church of Ireland minister whose family doesn’t speak Irish. This means apparently that her life is a wide mix of cultures, people and activities from the ministry to the theatre. I was still failing to see how this qualified her to be administering such advice to others but then the punchline – Mamó comes from a large family and herself has five children, grandchildrean and extended family, which obviously means she’s well-placed to offer advice to our Cavan-based guinea pigs. Her advice included such gems as play word games together, like scrabble and snap, to help encourage multi-linguism in a fun way. Or then there was the idea that planting vegetables and flowers gives children a chance to become closer to nature, engage in responsibility for caring for them and watch them grow. Other brilliant ideas to emerge included walking, picnicking, painting and cooking together. Simple really, all you have to do is what everyone else has been doing for generations.
This sort of programming only exists because of grant aid for Irish speaking programmes, which must have the folks at TG4 turning purple. TG4 has long been serving up some of the best made documentaries on Irish television and are very good at what they do. RTÉ importing such cheap tripe from the North is a shocking indictment of their commitment to quality programming. If they need to fill a quota on RTÉ One or Two in Irish programming, they should look west to excellent material being made within the State-run house.
The thought that there are three more weeks ahead is demoralising. I’d say avoid but if you’re determined, see it on RTÉ One on Monday at 8.30pm.
Far more interesting fare with another northerner was the BBC’s Major Breakthrough on Rory McIlroy, following him through the upset of the Masters at Augusta to the dizzy heights of his win at the US Open. Much of the content was taken up immediately after his win at the Open until he arrived home to wild celebrations. There were no celebrations for Rory though, as he had to be on the road with his father at 5am that morning to play a round of golf for one of his sponsors, followed by an overnight flight to London for more promotional work, before finally making it home. It’s a lot of hard work, but while most of us had our fingers crossed hoping for a taste of success in the euromillions draw, sports stars are well compensated for their efforts, right down to replica golf course out the back of his house.
It’s surprising, and indeed refreshing then that McIlroy comes across as a nice, down to earth guy, who is more than aware of his surroundings. I don’t think I have ever heard another sports star be so candid about a break-up with their partner, but McIllroy was willing to admit his break with girlfriend, Holly Sweeney, earlier in the year had been “a big mistake” and his at that. Can’t imagine the Rooney/Giggs types ever doing that.