Poor excuse for action comedy

Film Review

The Bounty Hunter
DIRECTED BY: Andy Tennant
STARRING: Jennifer Aniston, Gerard Butler, Jason Sudeikis, Christine Baranski
CERT: 12A

Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler are a couple of likeable and gifted actors who have spent too long lately wasting their time and talents on disposable drivel. They could each do with getting their teeth into something a bit more substantial but this sad excuse for an action comedy is most certainly not it.
Butler is Milo Boyd, a former cop who now makes his living as a bounty hunter. His latest job is to bring in a lady who had the bad manners to jump bail after being arrested for assaulting a cop. For Milo, it’s a breeze of a gig and he jumps at the chance of an easy five grand.
He’s even more delighted when it turns out the culprit is his ex-wife Nicole (Aniston), who naturally doesn’t take too kindly to being handcuffed and carted off to jail by her former husband in his beloved vintage car. She’s a news reporter investigating some fishy circumstances surrounding an apparent suicide and the last thing she needs is to resume the old marital wars with her ex.
But things get a tad more awkward than that when her snooping gets them in trouble with some unpleasant fellows with high connections and when Milo’s gambling debts attract the attention of another bunch of dim but seriously unhappy heavies.
Meanwhile, Nicole’s not-so-secret admirer Stewart (Jason Sudeikis ­ providing occasional and much-needed laughs) is stalking the love of his life and her action man ex, who seem somewhat more concerned with bickering and scoring points than with any imminent danger to their bitter little souls.
Will they make it out alive? Will they fall madly in love all over again? Do you care enough to pay to find out? And more importantly ­ for all of our sakes, will screenwriter Sarah Thorp be taken to a secure facility and have her fingers removed to prevent her from ever doing anything like this again?
What do you think? I’m not sure I want to know. And no, there is no justice in the world but we all have our fantasies.

Old Dogs
DIRECTED BY: Walt Becker
STARRING: Robin Williams, John Travolta, Kelly Preston
CERT: PG

If Butler and Aniston are troubled by not having seen a decent script in a while, John Travolta and Robin Williams could give them a couple of understanding manly shoulders to cry on. Williams, in particular, would sympathise. It has been so long since the great man encountered quality that he has clearly forgotten what it even looks like.
Old Dogs is directed by Walt Becker, the man behind Wild Hogs. Look at that,­ Wild Hogs, Old Dogs, they rhyme! Ha ha! Keep an eye out for his next feature, Wild Old Frogs Wearing Togs And Clogs In Irish Bogs.
Anyway, Wild Hogs was not what you would call a subtle and tasteful comedy but compared to Old Dogs it was a work of rare cinematic genius. Williams is Dan, a fussy, uptight middle-aged marketing executive who was married once for a day, after a Britney-style rush of blood to the head. He has thought no more about it in the years since, so it’s a bit of a surprise when his ex-wife Vicki (Preston) turns up at his door to inform him that she is going to prison for a fortnight for getting uppity at a political protest. Oh, and she needs him to look after her seven-year-old twins. Which, by the way, are actually his.
And that’s a shock but surely he can manage for a couple of weeks, with a helping hand from his bachelor business partner Charlie (Travolta). Though the boys are about to close the biggest business deal of their lives and entertaining a couple of kids, and somehow navigating all manner of slapstick disasters, just might cause an unforeseen hitch or two.
Which is nothing compared to the pain it will cause to the casual viewer, should any such creature be brave or foolish enough to put his brain on the line for this.